Paris agrees to re-settle Roma in Strasbourg
The French government has agreed not to deport any more Roma after widespread protest.
The deportations have attracted criticism from all quarters, from President Barroso, who suggested the treatment of Europe’s largest minority group raised disturbing images of Europe’s past.
The Brussels Jungle has learned that President Sarkozy is about to make a surprise change in policy that will address criticism that the Roma, who are EU citizens, are being unjustly deported. According to highly secret documents, the deportations of the Roma, who the French blame for an increase in crime, will cease with immediate effect. The Roma will instead, in the words of one document shown to us by a concerned French official, “be relocated to an appropriate facility”.
We can reveal that the facility being discussed is the European Parliament in Strasbourg.
According to the documents, the Parliament was chosen because of its range of facilities. Roma will be given accommodation in the MEPs and officials offices and the restaurants was expected to easily cope with feeding the large number of new residents.
Speaking off the record, one French official, who helped plan the move, said “There will be no accusation of deportations as they will remain in France. We can keep them separate from French society, yet can provide them with facilities, including a range of bars and dining halls, that even the Red Cross would approve.”
He added that, “In reality, very few MEPs come here and they’re not here for long, they can hold their meetings elsewhere and although the parliamentary chamber is designated as a play room for the kids, we can easily take them for a walk by the river when the plenary is in session. To be honest, we won’t even have to take the toys out as the deputies would enjoy using them, especially when someone like Cohn-Bendit is speaking. We may however have to circulate an email asking them not to throw them around, especially if they have sharp corners.” When asked about potential complaints by MEPs, the official smiled and said “Well, they asked us to stop deporting, didn’t they?”



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Tongue in cheek!