Weapons of Mass Destruction found in Iceland

Former erronous sighting of WMD

The long search for elusive WMDs finally ended last weekend amid alarming reports that Iceland’s volcano is still continuing covert ash-spewing activities. Although these activities had recently slowed down somewhat, there is still a very high risk of disruption to European air space. This news came as an unwelcome shock to world leaders who had been busy trying to negotiate a peaceful cease-fire of the gritty ash since the mountain erupted last month.

In an emergency Global Summit which included both the United States and Great Britain, the international government heads regrettably took action as a last resort – they unanimously agreed to designate the Icelandic mountain an official Weapon of Mass Disruption under the United Nations LMSA (Legislation for Making Spurious Accusations).

An unidentified participant at the Global Summit confirmed that a special communiqué was drafted during the early hours of Sunday morning amid much tobacco smoke and (allegedly medicinal) whiskey. The official report will be immediately dispatched to Iceland as soon as they can sober up enough to work out to whom it should be addressed.

As well as warning Iceland that its volcanic WMD is in gross violation of the UN laws, the communiqué officially orders Iceland to disband its mountain immediately or face serious consequences from the international community. At this stage, it is unclear what form these consequences could take. Many believe that Iceland is likely to suffer economic sanctions if it does not heed this serious warning. However, the Icelandic nation will probably avoid any risk of military strikes …as long as no one finds out they have oil reserves.

Written by a member of Charlie’s Tribe