Bad lovers, cannabis and … elephants

On this weekend celebrating Europe, animal protection organisations from around the world united to put forward a Resolution to end the use of animals in stupid video spots trying to scare humans from acting like morons.

The Resolution was presented to the media in a press conference held by the German Animal Welfare Federation (Deutscher Tierschutzbund), Eurogroup for Animal Welfare and the Humane Society of the United States. Animal protection organisations held a special Satellite meeting prior to the Congress at which the resolution was unanimously adopted.

A spokesperson later told the BJ reporters that the reason for agreeing so switfly to a common resolution had been the outrage felt by members when seeing a video put together by the French police, in which an elephant was gravely abused by being forced to smoke cannabis. While the spokesperson from the police kept on reiterating that the elephant in question was only a cartoon, animal activists said that the answer was just not satisfactory.

The same video created added irritation as the League of Lousy Lover (LLL or “triple L” as it’s often referred to) introduced a complaint before the French courts, based on the fact that “this video unduly associates bad lovers to cannabis use, a fact that is in full contradiction with reality, most bad lovers not needing illegal substances to be crap in bed”.